Anchorites / Ancren Rule

ANDREW the CHAPLAIN ON LOVE - BOOK 1	ANDREAS CAPELLANUS DE AMORE LIBER PRIMUS
PREFACE	PRAEFATIO
I AM greatly impelled by the continual urging of my love (dilectio) for you, my revered friend (amicus) Walter, to make known by word of mouth and to teach you by my writings the way in which a state of love (amor)between two lovers may maintain stability and likewise how those who do not love may get rid of the darts of Venus that are fixed in their hearts.	^[1] Cogit me multum assidua tuae dilectionis instantia, Gualteri venerande amice, ut meo tibi debeam famine propalare mearumque manuum scriptis docere qualiter inter amantes illaesus possit amoris status conservari, pariterve qui non amantur quibus modis sibi cordi affixa valeant Veneris iacula declinare.
You tell me that you are a new recruit of Love, and, having recently been wounded by an arrow of his, you do not know how to manage your horse’s reins properly and you cannot find any cure for yourself. How serious this is and how it troubles my soul no words of mine can make clear to you.	^[2] Asseris te namque novum amoris militem novaque ipsius sauciatum sagitta illius nescire apte gubernare frena caballi, nec ullum posse tibi remedium invenire. Quod quam sit grave quamque molestet meum animum nullis tibi possem sermonibus explicare.
For I know, having learned from experience, that it does not do the man who owes obedience to Venus’s service any good to give careful thought to anything except how he may always be doing something that will entangle him more firmly in his chains; he thinks he has nothing good except what may wholly please his love.	^[3] Novi enim et manifesto experimento percepi quod qui Veneris est servituti obnoxius nil valet perpensius cogitare nisi ut aliquid semper valeat suis actibus operari, quo magis possit ipsius illaqueari catenis; nihil credit se habere beatum nisi id quod penitus suo debeat amori placere.
Therefore, although it does not seem expedient to devote oneself to things of this kind or fitting for any prudent man to engage in this kind of hunting, nevertheless, because of the affection I have for you I can by no means refuse your request; because I know clearer than day that after you have learned the art of love your progress in it will be more cautious, in so far as I can I shall comply with your desire.	^[4] Quamvis igitur non multum videatur expediens huiusmodi rebus insistere, nec deceat quemquam prudentem huiusmodi vacare venatibus, tamen propter affectum quo tibi annector, tuae nullatenus valeo petitioni obstare; quia luce clarius novi quod docto in amoris doctrina cautior tibi erit in amore processus, tuae prout potero curabo postulationi parere.
BOOK I INTRODUCTION to THE TREATISE of LOVE	LIBER PRIMUS Accessus ad amoris tractatum
WE must first consider what love is, whence it gets its name, what the effect of love is, between what persons love may exist, how it may be acquired, retained, increased, decreased, and ended, what are the signs that one’s love is returned, and what one of the lovers ought to do if the other is unfaithful.	Est igitur primo videre quid sit amor, et unde dicatur amor, et quis sit effectus amoris, et inter quos possit esse amor, qualiter acquiratur amor, retineatur, augmentetur, minuatur, finiatur; et de notitia amoris mutui, et quid unus amantium agere debeat altero fidem fallente.
CHAPTER 1. WHAT LOVE IS	Capitulum I: Quid sit amor
Love is a certain inborn suffering derived from the sight of and excessive meditation upon the apearance of the opposite sex, which causes each one to wish above all things the embraces of the other and by common desire to carry out all of love’s precepts in the other’s embrace.	^[1] Amor est passio quaedam innata procedens ex visione et immoderata cogitatione formae alterius sexus, ob quam aliquis super omnia cupit alterius potiri amplexibus et omnia de utriusque voluntate in ipsius amplexu amoris praecepta compleri.
AMOR (love) as PASSIO (suffering/passivity)
That love is suffering is easy to see, for before the love becomes equally balanced on both sides there is no greater anguish, since the lover is always in fear that his love may not gain its desire and that he is wasting his efforts.	^[2] Quod amor sit passio facile est videre. Nam antequam amor sit ex utraque parte libratus, nulla est angustia maior, quia semper timet amans ne amor optatum capere non possit effectum, nec in vanum suos labores emittat.
He fears, too, that rumors of it may get abroad, and he fears everything that might harm it in any way, for before things are perfected a slight disturbance often spoils them.	^[3] Vulgi quoque timet rumores et omne quod aliquo posset modo nocere; res enim imperfectae modica turbatione deficiunt.
If he is a poor man, he also fears that the woman may scorn his poverty; if he is ugly, he fears that she may despise his lack of beauty or may give her love to a more handsome man; if he is rich, he fears that his parsimony in the past may stand in his way.	^[4] Sed et si pauper ipse sit, timet ne eius mulier vilipendat inopiam; si turpis est, timet ne eius contemnatur informitas vel pulchrioris se mulier annectat amori; si dives est, praeteritam forte tenacitatem sibi timet obesse.
To tell the truth, no one can number the fears of one single lover. This kind of love, then, is a suffering which is felt by only one of the persons and may be called “single love.”	^[5] Et ut vera loquamur, nullus est qui possit singularis amantis enarrare timores. Est igitur amor ille passio, qui ex altera tantum est parte libratus, qui potest singularis amor vocari.
But even after both are in love the fears that arise are just as great, for each of the lovers fears that what he has acquired with so much effort may be lost through the effort of someone else, which is certainly much worse for a man than if, having no hope, he sees that his efforts are accomplishing nothing, for it is worse to lose the things you are seeking than to be deprived of a gain you merely hope for.	^[6] Postquam etiam amor utriusque perficitur, non minus timores insurgunt; uterque namque timet amantium ne quod est multis laboribus acquisitum per alterius labores amittat, quod valde magis onerosum constat hominibus quam si spe frustrati nullum sibi suos fructum sentiant [sibi] afferre labores.
The lover fears, too, that he may offend his loved one in some way; indeed he fears so many things that it would be difficult to tell them.	^[7] Gravius est enim carere quaesitis quam sperato lucro privari. Timet etiam ne in aliquo offendat amantem; tot enim timet quod nimium esset narrare difficile.
PASSIO (suffering/passivity) as INNNER (inborn/subjective)
That this suffering is inborn I shall show you clearly, because if you will look at the truth and distinguish carefully you will see that it does not arise out of any action; only from the reflection (cogitatio) of the mind upon what it sees does this suffering come.	^[8] Quod autem illa passio sit innata, manifesta tibi ratione ostendo, quia passio illa ex nulla oritur actione subtiliter veritate inspecta; sed ex sola cogitatione quam concipit animus ex eo quod vidit passio illa procedit.
For when a man sees some woman fit for love and shaped according to his taste, he begins at once to lust after her in his heart; then the more he thinks about her the more he burns with love, until he comes to a fuller meditation.	^[9] Nam quum aliquis videt aliquam aptam amori et suo formatam arbitrio, statim eam incipit concupiscere corde; postea vero quotiens de ipsa cogitat, totiens eius magis ardescit amore, quousque ad cogitationem devenerit pleniorem.
Presently he begins to think about the fashioning of the woman and to differentiate her limbs, to think about what she does, and to pry into the secrets of her body, and he desires to put each part of it to the fullest use.⁴	^[10] Postmodum mulieris incipit cogitare facturas, et eius distinguere membra suosque actus imaginari eiusque corporis secreta rimari ac cuiusque membri officio desiderat perpotiri.
Then after he has come to this complete meditation, love cannot hold the reins, but he proceeds at once to action; straightway he strives to get a helper and to find an intermediary.	^[11] Postquam vero ad hanc cogitationem plenariam devenerit, sua frena nescit continere amor, sed statim procedit ad actum; statim enim iuvamen habere laborat et internuntium invenire.
He begins to plan how he may find favor with her, and he begins to seek a place and a time opportune for talking; he looks upon a brief hour as a very long year, because he cannot do anything fast enough to suit his eager mind. It is well known that many things happen to him in this manner.	^[12] Incipit enim cogitare qualiter eius gratiam valeat invenire, incipit etiam quaerere locum et tempus cum opportunitate loquendi, ac brevem horam longissimum reputat annum, quia cupienti animo nil satis posset festinanter impleri; et multa sibi in hunc modum evenire constat.
This inborn suffering comes, therefore, from seeing and meditating. Not every kind of meditation can be the cause of love, an excessive one is required; for a restrained thought does not, as a rule, return to the mind, and so love cannot arise from it.	^[13] Est igitur illa passio innata ex visione et cogitatione. Non quaelibet cogitatio sufficit ad amoris originem, sed immoderata exigitur; nam cogitatio moderata non solet ad mentem redire, et ideo ex ea non potest amor oriri.
CHAPTER II. BETWEEN WHAT PERSONS LOVE MAY EXIST	Capitulum II: Inter quos possit esse amor
Now, in love you should note first of all that love cannot exist except between persons of opposite sexes. Between two men or two women love can find no place, for we see that two persons of the same sex are not at all fitted for giving each other the exchanges of love or for practicing the acts natural to it. Whatever nature forbids, love is ashamed to embrace.	^[1] Hoc autem est praecipue in amore notandum, quod amor nisi inter diversorum sexuum personas esse non potest. Nam inter duos mares vel inter duas feminas amor sibi locum vindicare non valet; duae namque sexus eiusdem personae nullatenus aptae videntur ad mutuas sibi vices reddendas amoris vel eius naturales actus exercendos. Nam quidquid natura negat, amor erubescit amplecti.
Every attempt of a lover tends toward the enjoyment of the embraces of her whom he loves; he thinks about it continually, for he hopes that with her he may fulfill all the mandates of love—that is, those things which we find in treatises on the subject.	^[2] Ad hoc totus tendit conatus amantis, et de hoc illius assidua est cogitatio, ut eius quam amat fruatur amplexibus; optat enim ut cum ea omnia compleat amoris mandata, id est ea quae in amoris tractatibus reperiuntur inserta.
Therefore in the sight of a lover nothing can be compared to the act of love, and a true lover would rather be deprived of all his money and of everything that the human mind can imagine as indispensable to life rather than be without love, either hoped for or attained.	^[3] In amantis ergo conspectu nil valet amoris actui comparari, potiusque verus amans cunctis exspoliari divitiis vel omni eo quod humano posset excogitari ingenio, sine quo quis vivere non potest, penitus privari eligeret quam sperato vel acquisito amore carere.
For what under heaven can a man possess or own for which he would undergo so many perils as we continually see lovers submit to of their own free will? We see them despise death and fear no threats, scatter their wealth abroad and come to great poverty.	^[4] Quid enim homo posset possidere vel habere sub coelo, pro quo vellet tot subiacere periculis quot assidue videmus amantes ex libero arbitrio se subiugare? Videmus enim ipsos mortem contemnere nullasque timere minas, divitias spargere et ad multas devenire inopias.
Yet a wise lover does not throw away wealth as a prodigal spender usually does, but he plans his expenditures from the beginning in accordance with the size of his patrimony; for when a man comes to poverty and want he begins to go along with his face downcast and to be tortured by many thoughts, and all joyousness leaves him.	^[5] Sapiens tamen amator divitias non abiicit tanquam prodigus consuevit dispensator abiicere, sed iuxta patrimonii facultates suis ab initio modum ponit impendiis. Nam inopiae quisque necessitati suppositus deflexo incipit incedere vultu et multis cogitationibus cruciari, et omnis eum alacritas derelinquit.
And when that goes, melancholy comes straightway to take its place, and wrath claims a place in him; so he begins to act in a changed manner toward his beloved and to appear frightful to her, and the things that cause love to increase begin to fail.	^[6] Qua quidem cessante illico melancolia ex adverso consurgit, in eo suum sibi locum vindicat ira, et ita incipit esse alteratus amanti et ei terribilis apparere, sicque incipiunt amoris incrementa deficere; ergo incipit amor diminui. Amor enim semper minuitur vel augetur.
Therefore love begins to grow less, for love is always either decreasing or increasing. I know from my own experience that when poverty comes in, the things that nourished love begin to leave, because “poverty has nothing with which to feed its love.” ⁵ [Ovid The Cure for Love, 1. 749.]	^[7] Manifesto igitur experimento cognosco quod dura superveniente inopia incipiunt fomenta amoris deficere, quia ‘Non habet unde suum paupertas pascat amorem.’
But I do not tell you this, my friend, with the idea of indicating by what I say that you should follow avarice, which, as all agree, cannot remain in the same dwelling with love, but to show you that you should by all means avoid prodigality and should embrace generosity with both arms. Note, too, that nothing which a lover gets from his beloved is pleasing unless she gives it of her own free will.	^[8] Non autem haec tibi enarro, amice, quasi velim avaritiam sectandam esse meis tibi faminibus indicare, quam cunctis constat in eodem cum amore non posse domicilio permanere, sed ut tibi ostendere valeam prodigalitatem esse modis omnibus fugiendam, et ipsam largitatem utroque brachio amplectendam. Nota etiam quod amans nihil sapidum ab amante consequitur nisi ex illius voluntate procedat.
CHAPTER III. WHERE LOVE GETS ITS NAME	Capitulum III: Unde dicatur amor
Love gets its name (amor) from the word for hook (amus), which means “to capture” or “to be captured,” for he who is in love is captured in the chains of desire and wishes to capture someone else with his hook.	^[1] Dicitur autem amor ab amo verbo, quod significat capere vel capi. Nam qui amat captus est cupidinis vinculis aliumque desiderat suo capere hamo.
Just as a skillful fisherman tries to attract fishes by his bait and to capture them on his crooked hook, so the man who is a captive of love tries to attract another person by his allurements and exerts all his efforts to unite two different hearts with an intangible bond, or if they are already united he tries to keep them so forever.	^[2] Sicut enim piscator astutus suis conatur cibiculis attrahere pisces et ipsos sui hami capere unco, ita vero captus amore suis nititur alium attrahere blandimentis, totisque nisibus instat duo diversa quodam incorporali vinculo corda unire, vel unita semper coniuncta servare.
CHAPTER IV WHAT THE EFFECT OF LOVE IS	Capitulum IV: Quis sit effectus amoris

THE POSITIVE EFFECTS of LOVE
Now it is the effect of love that a true lover cannot be degraded with any selfishness/greed.	^[1] Effectus autem amoris hic est, quia verus amator nulla posset avaritia offuscari;
Love causes a rough and uncouth man to be distinguished for his handsomeness;	amor horridum et incultum omni facit formositate pollere,
it can endow a man even of the humblest birth with nobility of character;	infimos natu etiam morum novit nobilitate ditare,
it blesses the proud with humility;	superbos quoque solet humilitate beare;
and the man in love becomes accustomed to performing many services gracefully for everyone.	obsequia cunctis amorosus multa consuevit decenter parare.
O what a wonderful thing is love, which makes a man shine with so many virtues and teaches everyone, no matter who he is, so many good traits of character!	O, quam mira res est amor, qui tantis facit hominem fulgere virtutibus, tantisque docet quemlibet bonis moribus abundare!
There is another thing about love that we should not praise in few words: it adorns a man, so to speak, with the virtue of chastity, because he who shines with the light of one love can hardly think of embracing another woman, even a beautiful one. For when he thinks deeply of his beloved the sight of any other woman seems to his mind rough and rude.	^[2] Est et aliud quiddam in amore non brevi sermone laudandum, quia amor reddit hominem castitatis quasi virtute decoratum, quia vix posset de alterius etiam formosae cogitare amplexu, qui unius radio fulget amoris. Est enim suae menti, dum de amore suo plenarie cogitat, mulieris cuiuslibet horridus et incultus aspectus.
I wish you therefore to keep always in mind, Walter my friend, that if love were so fair as always to bring his sailors into the quiet port after they had been soaked by many tempests, I would bind myself to serve him forever. But because he is in the habit of carrying an unjust weight in his hand, I do not have full confidence in him any more than I do in a judge whom men suspect. And so for the present I refuse to submit to his judgment, because “he often leaves his sailors in the mighty waves.”	^[3] Hoc ergo tuo pectori volo semper esse affixum, Gualteri amice, quod si tali amor libramine uteretur ut nautas suos post multarum procellarum inundationem in quietis semper portum deduceret, me suae servitutis perpetuo vinculis obligarem. ^[4] Sed quia inaequale pensum sua solet manu gestare, de ipsius tanquam iudicis suspecti non ad plenum confido iustitia. Ideoque ad praesens eius recuso iudicium, quia ‘Saepe suos nautas valida relinquit in unda’.
But why love, at times, does not use fair weights I shall show you more fully elsewhere in this treatise.?	^[5] Sed quare amor quandoque ponderibus non utatur aequalibus, alibi tractatu latiori te plenius edocebo.
CHAPTER V. WHAT PERSONS ARE FIT FOR LOVE	Capitulum V: Quae personae sint aptae ad amorem
We must now see what persons are fit to bear the arms of love. You should know that everyone of sound mind who is capable of doing the work of Venus may be wounded by one of Love’s arrows unless prevented by age, or blindness, or excess of passion.	^[1] Est nunc videre quae sint aptae personae ad amoris arma ferenda. Et scire debes quod omnis compos mentis qui aptus est ad Veneris opera peragenda, potest amoris pertingi aculeis, nisi aetas impediat vel caecitas vel nimia voluptatis abundantia.
Age is a bar, because after the sixtieth year in a man and the fiftieth in a woman, although one may have intercourse his passion cannot develop into love; because at that age the natural heat begins to lose its force, and the natural moisture is greatly increased, which leads a man into various difficulties and troubles him with various ailments, and there are no consolations in the world for him except food and drink.	^[2] Aetas impedit, quia post sexagesimum annum in masculo et post quinquagesimum in femina, licet coire homo possit, eius tamen voluptas ad amorem deduci non potest, quia calor naturalis ab ea aetate suas incipit amittere vires, et humiditas sua validissime inchoat incrementa fovere, atque hominem in varias deducit angustias et aegritudinum diversarum molestat insidiis, nullaque sunt sibi in hoc saeculo praeter cibi et potus solatia.
Similarly, a girl under the age of twelve and a boy before the fourteenth year do not serve in love’s army.	^[3] Similiter ante duodecim annos femina et ante decimum quartum annum masculus non solet in amoris exercitu militare.
However, I say and insist that before his eighteenth year a man cannot be a true lover, because up to that age he is overcome with embarrassment over any little thing, which not only interferes with the perfecting of love, but even destroys it if it is well perfected.	^[4] Dico tamen et firmiter assero quod masculus ante decimum octavum annum verus esse non potest amans, quia usque ad id tempus pro re satis modica verecundo rubore perfunditur, qui non solum perficiendum impedit amorem sed bene perfectum exstinguit.
But we find another even more powerful reason, which is that before this age a man has no constancy, but is changeable in every way, for such a tender age cannot think about the mysteries of love’s realm. Why love should kindle in a woman at an earlier age than in a man I shall perhaps show you elsewhere.	^[5] Sed et alia ratio efficacior invenitur, quia ante praefatum tempus nulla in homine constantia viget, sed in omnibus variabilis reperitur. Nec enim aetatis de amoris imperii arcanis posset tanta infirmitas cogitare. Cur vero citius in muliere amor quam in masculis exardescit, alibi forte docebo.
Blindness is a bar to love, because a blind man cannot see anything _upon which his mind can reflect immoderately, and so love cannot arise in him, as I have already fully shown. But I admit that this is true only of the acquiring of love, for I do not deny that a love which a man acquires before his blindness may last after he becomes blind.	^[6] Caecitas impedit amorem, quia caecus videre non potest unde suus possit animus immoderatam suscipere cogitationem; ergo in eo amor non potest oriri, sicut plenarie supra constat esse probatum. Sed hoc verum esse in amore acquirendo profiteor; nam amorem ante caecitatem hominis acquisitum non nego in caeco posse durare.
An excess of passion is a bar to love, because there are men who are slaves to such passionate desire that they cannot be held in the bonds of love—men who, after they have thought long about some woman or even enjoyed her, when they see another woman straightway desire her embraces, and they forget about the services they have received from their first love and they feel no gratitude for them. Men of this kind lust after every woman they see; their love is like that of a shameless dog. They should rather, I believe, be compared to asses, for they are moved only by that low nature which shows that men are on the level of the other animals rather than by that true nature which sets us apart from all the other animals by the difference of reason. Of such lovers I shall speak elsewhere.	^[7] Nimia voluptatis abundantia impedit amorem, quia sunt quidam qui tanta voluptatis cupidine detinentur quod amoris non possent retineri reticulis; qui post multas etiam de muliere cogitationes habitas vel fructus assumptos, postquam aliam vident statim illius concupiscunt amplexus, et obsequii a priore amante suscepti obliviosi et ingrati exsistunt. ^[8] Illi tales quot vident tot cupiunt libidini immisceri. Istorum talis amor est qualis est canis impudici. Sed nos credimus asinis comparandos; ea namque solummodo natura moventur quae ceteris animantibus homines ostendit aequales, non vera quae rationis differentia nos a cunctis facit animalibus separari. De talibus amantibus alibi dicetur.
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BOOK III THE REJECTION of LOVE	DE AMORE LIBER TERTIUS De reprobatione amoris
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Besides this there is another reason why Love seems very hateful,and this is that he very often carries unequal weights ³⁵ and always makes a man fall in love with some woman whom he cannot by any amount of solicitation obtain, since she does not return his love, not having been wounded by Cupid’s arrow. Therefore you should not choose to commit yourself to him who compels you to seek with all your might something which he himself arranges shall be utterly denied you.	[113] Amor praeterea ratione alia satis videtur odibilis, quia saepius inaequalia pondera portat et eam semper cogit amare, quam nulla posset homo sollicitudine obtinere, qua mutuum illa non sentit amorem, quum amoris non instigetur aculeis. Non est ergo illius arbitrium eligendum, qui te cogit instanter illud toto mentis ingenio postulare, quod ipse idem tibi facit penitus denegari.
If Love wanted to be considered a just ruler, he would make only those people fall in love who could, either at once or after a proper amount of suffering, have their love returned; since he does not do this, it would seem proper to refuse to enter into his service. It does not seem as though you ought to love the company of a man who would lead you forth to battle and then when the fighting begins go over to the enemy and help him to defend himself against you. Therefore it is not advisable, my respected friend, for you to waste your days on love, which for all the reasons already given we agree ought to be condemned.	[114] Nam, si amor iustus vellet moderator haberi, id solum ad amandum cogeret amatores, quod statim vel post dignos labores eos mutua vice diligeret; quod quum non faciat, merito videtur eius militia recusanda. Non enim illius videtur amanda societas, qui te producit ad bellum et inito proelio transit ad hostes et tuitionis eis arma ministrat. Non expedit ergo, venerande amice, tuos in amore consumere dies, quem tot superius improbatum rationibus constat.
For if it deprives you of the grace of the Heavenly King, and costs you every real friend, and takes away all the honors of this world as well as every breath of praiseworthy reputation, and greedily swallows up all your wealth, and is followed by every sort of evil, as has already been said, why should you, like a fool, seek for love, or what good can you get from it that will repay you for all these disadvantages?	[115] Nam si te facit regis gratia carere coelestis et omni te penitus vero privat amico et huius saeculi cunctos subducit honores, omnisque famae laudabilis per eundem supprimitur aura, ac sui voracitate divitias devorat universas, et ex eo, sicut superius narratur, mala cuncta sequuntur, cur stulte quaeris amare, vel quod inde posses acquirere bonum, quod tibi valeret tot incommoda compensare?
That which above all you seek in love—the joy of having your love returned—you can never obtain, as we have already shown, no matter how hard you try, because no woman ever returns a man’s love. Therefore if you will examine carefully all the things that go to make up love, you will see clearly that there are conclusive reasons why a man is bound to avoid it with all his might and to trample under foot all its rules.	[116] Ned id quod quaeris in amore praecipuum, scilicet ut vice mutua diligaris, sicut superius edocetur, ullo posses obtinere labore, quia nulla femina mutuum rependit amorem. Si cuncta igitur quae in amore versantur vigili curaveris mente perquirere, clara poteris veritate cognoscere quam inevitabili quisque ratione tenetur amorem totis viribus evitare et eius penitus calcare mandata.
Now this doctrine of ours, which we have put into this little book for you, will if carefully and faithfully examined seem to present two different points of view. In the first part we tried to assent to your simple and youthful request and did not wish, on this subject, to give in to our indolence; so we set down completely, one point after another, the art of love, as you so eagerly asked us to do, and now that it is all arranged in the proper order, we hand it over to you.	[117] Haec igitur nostra subtiliter et fideliter examinata doctrina, quam tibi praesenti libello mandamus insertam, tibi duplicem sententiam propinabit. Nam in prima parte praesentis libelli tuae simplici et iuvenili annuere petitioni volentes ac nostrae quidem in hac parte parcere nolentes inertiae artem amatoriam, sicut nobis mente avida postulasti, serie tibi plena dirigimus et competenti ordinatione dispositam delegamus
If you wish to practice the system, you will obtain, as a careful reading of this little book will show you, all the delights of the flesh in fullest measure; but the grace of God, the companionship of the good, and the friendship of praiseworthy men you will with good reason be deprived of, and you will do great harm to your good name, and it will be difficult for you to obtain the honors of this world.	. [118] Quam si iuxta volueris praesentem exercere doctrinam, et sicut huius libelli assidua tibi lectio demonstrabit, omnes corporis voluptates pleno consequeris effectu; Dei tamen gratia, bonorum consortio atque virorum laudabilium amicitia iusta manebis ratione privatus, tuamque famam non modicam facies sustinere iacturam, nec facile huius saeculi consequeris honores.
In the latter part of the book we were more concerned with what might be useful to you, and of our own accord we added something about the rejection of love, although you had no reason to ask for it, and we treated the matter fully; perhaps we can do you good against your will.	[119] In ulteriori parte libelli tuae potius volentes utilitati consulere, de amoris reprobatione tibi nulla ratione petenti, ut bona forte praestemus invito, spontanea voluntate subiunximus et pleno tibi tractatu conscripsimus.
If you will study carefully this little treatise of ours and understand it completely and practice what it teaches, you will see clearly that no man ought to misspend his days in the pleasures of love.	Quem tractatum nostrum si attenta volueris investigatione disquirere ac mentis intellectu percipere et eiusdem doctrinam operis executione complere, ratione manifesta cognosces neminem in amoris voluptatibus debere male suos expendere dies,
If you abstain from it, the Heavenly King will be more favorably disposed toward you in every respect, and you will be worthy to have all prosperous success in this world and to fulfill all praiseworthy deeds and the honorable desires of your heart, and in the world to come to have glory and life everlasting.	ac inde rex coelestis in cunctis tibi propitius permanebit et in hoc saeculo prosperos mereberis habere successus et universa laudabilia et honesta desideria cordis implere, ac in futuro gloriam et vitam possidebis aeternam.
Therefore, Walter, accept this health-giving teaching we offer you, and pass by all the vanities of the world, so that when the Bridegroom cometh to celebrate the greater nuptials, and the cry ariseth in the night,³⁷ you may be prepared to go forth to meet Him with your lamps filled and to go in with Him to the divine marriage, and you will have no need to seek out in haste what you need for your lamps, and find it too late, and come to the home of the Bridegroom after the door is shut, and hear His venerable voice.	[120] Sumas ergo, Gualteri, salubrem tibi a nobis propinatam doctrinam et mundi penitus vanitates omittas, ut quum venerit sponsus nuptias celebrare maiores et clamor surrexerit in nocte, sis praeparatus cum lampadibus occurrere sibi ornatis secumque ad nuptias introire divinas, nec te oporteat tempore opportunitatis instantis tuae lampadis serotina ornamenta disquirere et ad sponsi domum ianua clausa venire ac verecundam vocem audire.
Be mindful, therefore, Walter, to have your lamps always supplied, that is, have the supplies of charity and good works. Be mindful ever to watch, lest the unexpected coming of the Bridegroom find you asleep in sins. Avoid then, Walter, practicing the mandates of love, and labor in constant watchfulness so that when the Bridegroom cometh He may find you wakeful; do not let worldly delight make you lie down in your sins, trusting to the youth of your body and confident that the Bridegroom will be late, since, as He tells us Himself, we know neither the day nor the hour.	[121] Studeas ergo, Gualteri, lampades semper ornatas habere, id est caritatis et bonorum operum ornamenta tenere. Memento etiam vigilare semper ne in peccatis dormiendo te inveniat sponsi repentinus adventus. Cave igitur, Gualteri, amoris exercere mandata et continua vigilatione labora ut, quum venerit sponsus, inveniat te vigilantem, nec de corporis iuventute confisum mundana delectatio te faciat in peccati dormitione iacere ac de sponsi tarditate securum, quia eiusdem sponsi voce testante nescimus diem neque horam.

7. VII. When one lover dies, a widowhood of two years is required of the survivor.

11. XI. It is not proper to love any woman whom one would be ashamed to seek to marry.

12. XII. A true lover does not desire to embrace in love anyone except his beloved.

14. XIV. The easy attainment of love makes it of little value;‑ “‘Iii faculty of attainment makes it prized.

16. XVI. When a lover suddenly catches sight of his beloved his heart palpitates.

22. XXII. Jealousy, and therefore love, are increased when one suspects his beloved.

25. XXV. A true lover considers nothing good except what he thinks will please his beloved.

30. XXX. A true lover is constantly and without intermission possessed by the thought of his beloved.

31. XXXI. Nothing forbids one woman being loved by two men or one man by two women.

From the seventh dialogue, book I: a man of the higher nobility speaks with a woman of the simple nobility

The man says: “I admit it is true that your husband is a very worthy man and that he is more blest than any man in the world because he has been worthy to have the joy of embracing Your Highness. But I am greatly surprised that you wish to misapply the term `love’ to that marital affection which husband and wife are expected to feel for each other after marriage, since everybody knows that love can have no place between husband and wife. They may be bound to each other by a great and immoderate affection, but their feeling cannot take the place of love, because it cannot fit under the true definition of love. For what is love but an inordinate desire to receive passionately a furtive and hidden embrace? But what embrace between husband and wife can be furtive, I ask you, since they may be said to belong to each other and may satisfy all of each other’s desires without fear that anybody will object? Besides, that most excellent doctrine of princes shows that nobody can make furtive use of what belongs to him. Do not let what I have said seem absurd to you, for husband and wife may be joined together by every sort of affection, but this feeling cannot take the place of love. In friendship we see the same thing. Father and son may feel every sort of affection for each other, but there is no true friendship between them, because, as Cicero tells us, the feeling that offspring of the blood have for each other is affection.45 It is clear then that there is just as much difference between every kind of affection of husband and wife and the obligation of lovers as there is between the mutual affection of father and son and the strongest friendship between two men, so that in the one case we say there is no love, just as in the other we say friendship is lacking. So then you see clearly that love can by no means exercise its functions between husband and wife, but has wished to withdraw its privileges completely.

“But there is another reason why husband and wife cannot love each other and that is that the very substance of love, without which true ‘ love cannot exist‑I mean jealousy‑is in such a case very much frowned upon and they should avoid it like the pestilence; but lovers should`: always welcome it as the mother and the nurse of love. From this you may see clearly that love cannot possibly flourish between you and your husband. Therefore, since every woman of character ought to love prudently, you can without doing yourself any harm accept the prayers of a suppliant and endow your suitor with your love.”

The woman says: “You are trying to take under your protection what all men from early times down have agreed to consider very reprehensible and to reject as hateful. For who can rightly commend envious jealousy or speak in favor of it, since jealousy is nothing but a shameful and evil suspicion of a woman? God forbid, therefore, that any worthy man should feel jealous about anyone, since this proves hostile to every prudent person and throughout the world is hated by everybody good. You are trying also, under cover of defining love, to condemn love between husband and wife, saying that their embraces cannot be furtive, since without fear that anyone may object they can fulfill each other’s desires. But if you understood the definition correctly it could not interfere with love between husband and wife, for the expression `hidden embraces’ is simply an explanation in different

words of the preceding one, and there seems to be no impossibility in husband and wife giving each other hidden embraces, even though they can do so without the least fear that anybody may raise an objection. Everyone should choose that love which may be fostered by security for continual embraces and, what is more, can be practiced every day without any sin. I ought therefore to choose a man to enjoy my embraces who can be to me both husband and lover, because, no matter what the definition of love may say, love seems to be nothing but a great desire to enjoy carnal pleasure with someone, and nothing prevents this feeling existing between husband and wife.”

The man says: “If the theory of love were perfectly clear to you and Love’s dart had ever touched you, your own feelings would have shown you that love cannot exist without jealousy, because, as I have already told you in more detail, jealousy between lovers is commended by every man who is experienced in love, while between husband and wife it is condemned throughout the world; the reason for this will be perfectly clear from a description of jealousy. Now jealousy is a true emotion whereby we greatly fear that the substance of our love may be weakened by some defect in serving the desires of our beloved, and it is an anxiety lest our love may not be returned, and it is a suspicion of the beloved, but without any shameful thought. From this it is clear that there are three aspects of jealousy. A truly jealous man is always afraid that his services may not be sufficient to retain the love of the woman he loves, and he is afraid that she may not love him as he loves her, and he is so tormented with anxiety that he wonders whether she doesn’t have another lover, although he believes that this cannot possibly be. But that this last aspect of jealousy is not proper for a married man is clearly apparent, for a husband cannot suspect his wife without the thought that such conduct on her part is shameful. Pure jealousy, in the case of a husband, takes a stain from the defect of its subject and ceases to be what it was. Water likewise may be beautifully clear, but if it begins to run over a sandy bed it becomes cloudy from the sand and loses its natural clearness; so charity, although by nature it deserves the reward of eternal blessedness, if given to the poor by a hypocrite or out of desire for empty glory loses its efficacy and causes the man to forfeit both what he gives and his reward for giving it. It is therefore plain enough that we have clearly demonstrated that jealousy cannot have its natural place between husband and wife and that therefore love between them must necessarily cease, because these two things always go together. But between lovers this jealousy is said to be preservative of love, because all three aspects which we have attributed to it are necessary to a lover; therefore jealousy between lovers is not condemned. We find many, however, who are deceived in this matter and say falsely that a shameful suspicion is jealousy, just as many often make the mistake of saying that an alloy of silver and lead is the finest silver. Wherefore not a few, being ignorant of the origin and description of jealousy, are often deceived and led into the gravest error. For even between persons who are not married this false jealousy may find a place and then they are no longer called glovers’ but gentleman friend’ and lady friend.’ As for what you tried to prove by your answer that the love which can be practiced without sin is far preferable that, apparently, cannot stand. For whatever solaces married people extend to each other beyond what are inspired by the desire for offspring or the payment of the marriage debt ‘46 cannot be free from sin, and the punishment is always greater when the use of a holy thing is perverted by misuse than if we practice the ordinary abuses. It is a more serious offense in a wife than in another woman, for the too ardent lover, as we are taught by the apostolic law, is considered an adulterer with his own wife.47 But it seems that no one should approve your

interpretation, which you draw from the definition of love, for, all the greater authors have told us that explanatory words must not be used in the actual definitions of things. From this everybody can see clearly that I have taken all the force out of your explanation, because that seems to be contrary to the meaning of the definition. But neither does your definition, which I admit you took from Love, have any reason back of it, for it includes the blind and the insane who, as the teaching of Andreas the Lover, chaplain of the royal court, shows us clearly, are to a completely banished from the court of love. Since, therefore, you cannot raise a reasonable objection to my application, no man will consider it to your credit if you make me languish for love of you and suffer so many torments on your account.”

The woman says: “You haven’t advanced any argument, so far as I can see, that would weaken my opinion or properly compel me to assent to your desire. However, since those duties you impose on me look so very much as though they were real ones, in order to deprive you of any opportunity to make a charge against me I shall not refuse to have the decision given by any lady or any man of character whom you may select, on the points at issue between us: namely, whether love can have any place between husband and wife and whether jealousy between lovers may properly be praised, for it seems to me that we can never settle this discussion or bring it a proper end.”

The man says: “I do not care to seek the decision of anybody else in this case if you will only examine properly what you yourself have said.”

The woman says: “The world never heard of anyone passing judgment on his own case, so I refuse to have anything to do with the matter, and I leave it to be entrusted to someone else.”

The man says: “I give you full power to appoint the arbiter in this dispute; however, I want to be judged by a woman, not by a man.”

The woman says: “If it suits you, it seems to me that the Countess of Champagne ought to be honored in this affair and should settle the disagreement.”

The man says: “I promise forever to abide by her decision in every respect and to keep it absolutely inviolate, because no one could ever have any reason to raise a question about her wisdom or the fairness of her decision. Let us then by common consent and desire write a letter showing the nature of our disagreement and the pledge we have made to abide by her decision. Let us do it in this fashion:

To the illustrious and wise woman M., Countess of Champagne, the noble woman A. and Count G. send greeting and whatever in the world is more pleasing.

Ancient custom shows us plainly, and the way of life of the ancients demands, that if we are to have justice done we should seek first of all in the place where Wisdom is clearly known to have found a home for herself and that we should seek for the truth of reason at its source, where it is abundant, rather than beg for its decisions where it flows scantily in small streams. For a great poverty of possessions can scarcely offer to anyone a wealth of good things or distribute an abundance of fertility. Where the master is oppressed by great want it is wholly impossible for the vassal to abound in wealth.

“Now on a certain day, as we sat under the shade of a pine tree of marvelous height and great breadth of spread, devoted wholly to love’s idleness and striving to investigate Love’s mandates in a good tempered and spirited debate, we began to discern a twofold doubt, and we wearied ourselves with laborious arguments as to whether true love can find any place between husband and wife and whether jealousy flourishing between two lovers ought to be approved of. After we had argued the matter back and forth and each of us seemed to bolster up his position with reasonable arguments, neither one would give in to the other or agree with the arguments he brought forward. We ask you to settle this dispute, and we have sent you both sides of the question in detail, so that after you have carefully examined the truth of it our disagreement may be brought to a satisfactory end and settled by a fair decision. For knowing clearly and in manifest truth that you have a great abundance of wisdom and that you would not want to deprive anyone of justice, we believe that we will in no wise be deprived of it; we most urgently implore Your Excellency’s decision, and we desire with all our hearts, begging you most humbly by our present address, that you will give continued attention to our case and that Your Prudence will render a fair decision in the matter without making any delay in giving the verdict.”

“To the prudent and noble woman A. and the illustrious and famous Count G., M., Countess of Champagne, sends greeting.

“Since we are bound to hear the just petitions of everybody, and since it is not seemly to deny our help to those who ask what is proper, especially when those who go wrong on questions of love ask to be set right by our decision‑which is what the tenor of your letter indicates ‑we have tried diligently and carefully to carry this out without any extended delay.

`Now your letter has shown that this is the doubt that has arisen between you: whether love can have any place between husband and wife and whether between lovers jealousy is blameworthy; in both questions each of you falls back on his own opinion and opposes that of the other, and you want us to give our opinion which side properly should get the decision. We have therefore examined carefully the statements of both sides and have in very truth inquired into the matter by every possible means, and we wish to end the case with this decision. We declare and we hold as firmly established that love cannot exert its powers between two people who are married to each other. For lovers give each other everything freely, under no compulsion of necessity, but married people are in duty bound to give in to each other’s desires and deny themselves to each other in nothing. Besides, how does it increase a husband’s honor if after the manner of lovers he enjoys the embraces of his wife, since the worth of character of neither can be increased thereby, and they seem to have nothing more than they already had a right to? And we say the same thing for still another reason, which is that a precept of love tells us that no woman, even if she is married, can be crowned with the reward of the King of Love unless she is seen to be enlisted in the service of Love himself outside the bonds of wedlock. But another rule of Love teaches that no one can be in love with two men. Rightly, therefore, Love cannot acknowledge any rights of his between husband and wife. But there is still another argument that seems to stand in the way of this, which is that between them there can be no true jealousy, and without it true love may not exist, according to the rule of Love himself, which says, `He who is not jealous cannot love.’ 4s

“Therefore let this our verdict, pronounced with great moderation and supported by the opinion of a great many ladies, be to you firm and indubitable truth.

“I want to explain to you something else that is in my mind, something which I know many keep hidden in their hearts, but which I do not think you are ignorant of, and that is that one kind of love is pure, and one is called mixed. It is the pure love which binds together the heart of two lovers with every feeling of delight. This kind consists in the contemplation of the mind and the affection of the heart; it goes as far as the kiss and the embrace and the modest contact with the nude lover, omitting the final solace, for that is not permitted to those who wish to love purely.°$ This is the kind that anyone who is intent upon love ought to embrace with all his might, for this love goes on increasing without end, and we know that no one ever regretted practicing it, and the more of it one has the more one wants. This love is distinguished by being of such virtue that from it arises all excellence of character, and no injury comes from it, and God sees very little offense in it. No maiden can ever be corrupted by such a love, nor can a widow or a wife receive any harm or suffer any injury to her reputation. This is the love I cherish, this I follow and ever adore and never cease urgently to demand of you. But that is called mixed love which gets its effect from every delight of the flesh and culminates in the final act of Venus. What sort of love this is you may clearly see from what I have already said, for this kind quickly fails, and lasts but a short time, and one often regrets having practiced it; by it one’s neighbor is injured, the Heavenly King is offended, and from it come very grave dangers.s8$ But I do not say this as though I meant to condemn mixed love, I merely wish to show which of the two is preferable. But mixed love, too, is real love, and it is praiseworthy, and we say that it is the source of all good things, although from ìt grave dangers threaten, too. Therefore I approve of both pure love and mixed love, but I prefer to practice pure love. You should therefore put aside all fear of deception and choose one of the two kinds of love”

The woman says: “You are saying things that no one ever heard or knew of, things that one can scarcely believe. I wonder if anyone was ever found with such continence that he could resist the promptings of passion and control the actions of his body. Everybody would think it miraculous if a man could be placed in a fire and not be burned.°° But if any man should be found with this faith and purity of love which you mention and this physical continence that you talk about, I would praise and approve his determination and consider it worthy of every honor, yet without any intention of condemning that mixed love which most of the world enjoys. But although other men may choose either kind of love, you ought not enter into the service of either, for a clerk ought to concern himself only with the services of the Church and to avoid all the desires of the flesh.’° He ought to be a stranger to all forms of delight and above all to keep his body unspotted for the Lord ‘71 since the Lord has granted him privileges of such great dignity and rank that he may consecrate His flesh and blood with his own hands and by his words he may absolve the offenses of sinners. If you should see my mind inclining to a lapse of the flesh, you are bound by virtue of the office God has granted you to call me back from the errors I am starting to commit, and to persuade me to be chaste in every respect, and to set me such an example that you may freely castigate the sins of others.

After they had fought in this fashion for a long time, the vision of the knight of the palace, whom the Briton had struck on the head with two shrewd blows in rapid succession, began to be so disturbed that he could see almost nothing. When the Briton perceived this, he leapt boldly upon him and quickly struck him, beaten, from his horse. Then he seized the hawk, and, glancing as he did so at the two dogs, he saw a written parchment, which was fastened to the perch with a little gold chain. When he inquired carefully concerning this, he was told, “This is the parchment on which are written the rules of love which the King of Love himself, with his own mouth, pronounced for lovers. You should take it with you and make these rules known to lovers if you want to take away the hawk peaceably.” He took the parchment, and after he had been given courteous permission to depart, quickly returned, without any opposition, to the lady of the wood, whom he found in the same place in the grove where she was when he first came upon her as he was riding along. She rejoiced greatly over the victory he had gained and dismissed him with these words, “Dearest friend, go with my permission, since sweet Britain desires you. But, that your departure may not seem too grievous to you, I ask you to come here sometimes alone, and you can always have me with you.” He kissed her thirteen times over and went joyfully back to Britain. Afterward he looked over the rules which he had found written in the parchment, and then, in accordance with the answer he had previously received, he made them known to all lovers. These are the rules.